AIN'T THAT A KICK IN THE RIBS? (A MANLY NIGHT OF MUAY THAI BOXING)

Just like back in the West, there is really nothing more macho in Bangkok than watching two sweaty, nearly-naked men beat the crap out of each other. I suppose that's why a movie like Beowulf can be so popular in this day and age.

Last week, myself and some friends were in the mood for a night of manly pursuits so we headed over to Lumpinee Stadium to witness the ancient art of Muay Thai boxing live and in person.

Muay Thai boxing has a lot in common with regular boxing: two guys put on boxing shorts and gloves and dance around a square ring while repeatedly hitting each other.


Also like regular boxing, the boxers will start embracing when they need a short break to catch their breath.


What really sets Muay Thai boxing apart from regular boxing is that other parts of the fighters' body can be used as weapons, not just the fists. This includes feet, knees and elbows. The scoring rules of Muay Thai clearly states that the fighter who uses these weapons correctly, according to the rules, and can weaken or damage his opponent more will be the winner. It was kind of difficult for me to determine if they were doing it correctly or not.


Other rules are as follows: the fighter who uses Muay Thai's techniques correctly according to the rules and can clearly hurt his opponent more will be the winner; the fighter who can use Muay Thai's weapons to cause more cuts and bruises will be the winner; the fighter who makes more moves will be the winner; the fighter who can protect himself and can hit back and avoid getting hit according to Muay Thai's techniques will be the winner, and the fighter who makes no fouls or fewer fouls will be the winner.

I'm not sure what happens if one fighter makes more moves while the other one causes more cuts and bruises. These rules seemed a little ambiguous to me and at the end of most of these five-round fights, I was at a loss as to who the winner was until it was announced.


This was a fun night out, but the dreaded Thailand two-pricing system for foreigners was in full effect this evening. When we went to get tickets, we were told that we had to get the best seats because they wanted to treat us to the best possible experience. We said that we didn't need the best experience (which comes with a price tag of 2000 Baht - over $60), just a good (cheaper) experience. They said, sorry those are the rules: foreigners in front, locals in back. And so you can see, here we are surrounded by our fellow white people:

And most of the Thai people are in the cheap seats:

It was almost as much fun to watch the crowd as it was to watch the fights themselves. There is a lot of open betting going on here and it makes for a rowdy atmosphere with people getting very animated as they cheer every move.

We had to watch eight fights (which took over two hours) before they got to the Main Event. A few times a fighter would get knocked down, but he always got up quickly and each of those fights lasted the full five rounds.

But when the Main Event finally rolled around, the action picked up (faster punching, more punches, more kicking, etc.), but it ended very quickly in the second round and the fighter was put on a stretcher and carried off. To me, it had the feeling of a "fix" but who knows.


Another difference between Muay Thai and regular boxing is that the winner gets a pretty necklace of flowers and ribbons as opposed to a gaudy gold belt.


There were ring girls too, but they were dressed in traditional Thai attire.

Lumpinee Stadium is pretty small, so no matter where you're situated, you are always close to the action. This includes a trip to the toilet where you walk past the area where all of the fighters are getting ready to step in the ring. The whole thing smelled like one giant Ben Gay convention.


All in all, it was a good time, aside from the extreme price gouging for foreigners. I suppose I am used to that over here, but every time it happens whether it's at a national park or a museum or a boxing match, it always rubs me the wrong way because the price is about five times of what a local would pay. Oh well, when in Thailand...